The Bartender Chronicles v.20

These are the stories and the commentary from behind the bar.

It’s a bartender’s job to be attentive.
It’s not necessary to notice certain little things like the fact that you’ve pulled the straw out of every drink or that you don’t squeeze the lime and just set it aside or that you always ask for two lemons. Little things like that allow me to adjust the way I serve your drink so you have the best possible experience.

There are other things that are important to notice, though. The guy at the corner who has been here each night with a different girl using the same stories is obviously dating around or cheating. The girl who used to talk nonstop about her boyfriend, but now downs drinks like there’s no tomorrow with red eyes probably just got dumped.

Sometimes all the practice we have being attentive just allows us to watch and listen… to things like this:

Scenario:
Guy and Girl make out at the corner of the bar for just under an hour. Hardcore making out. Tongues all over each others’ faces and major groping.

Guy: You wanna get out of here and go to my place?

Girl: No. I’m not going to cheat on my boyfriend.

Guy: Baby, it’s not cheating if you’re drunk.

That’s logical GOLD for you.

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3 Responses to The Bartender Chronicles v.20

  1. doniree says:

    Ha, except sorry but you just DID cheat on your boyfriend. Whoops!

  2. Also file under “Sexually Coercive Things Men Say to Get Inebriated Women to Come Home With Them When They Don’t Want to.”

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